Not too long ago, I browsed through my past monthly online calendars and noticed several names of very important and not so important people. There were also lots of birthday dinners, luncheon meetings, trips to the bank, pro bono coaching sessions, runs to the supermarket and mall to get stuff that others wanted/needed – but they far outnumbered the entries for the most important person in my life…ME!
As I am now undergoing a radical transformation in my life, I have had plenty of time to reflect on my past daily behavior and rearrange my days according to what feeds my spirit and moves me in the direction of my goals and dreams. I have also noticed that over the course of the past two plus years I’ve been doing tons of things based on what was needed for everyone else, including my largest client that started out as a great idea but ended up being the most difficult “class” I have taken in “the school of life.” How could I not have honored what was needed for my spirit? Easy…everything else took precedence ~ I kept stating that one day I would set aside time for me.
I’ve since decided that from this point on, I’m going to add “Anita” to my weekly schedule and set aside precious time out of my week “just for me!” If I thought all those names were important enough to placed in my calendar, then “Anita” certainly deserves to have a regular spot because I am the most important pereson in MY life.
There will always be meetings to attend, things needed by others, obligations that you can’t just “blow off” so why not carve out a little time for yourself. While it would be nice of others to remind us to do this for ourselves…it is our ultimate responsibility to take the time we need to nourish our own bodies, mind and soul. Let’s not get it twisted…of course, I can now decide to do something for myself at any given moment due to the new flexibilty – but by nature, I am the type of person who’d find something else to do that I feel is “more important.” This usually means that I have a tendency to fill in those empty time slots doing things for other people OR those things that other’s could be doing for me. By making a date with myself, I am consciously allotting valuable time for my body, mind and spirit to recharge.
Time for me means doing anything that gives me pleasure without the guilt and the pressure. It could be a whole afternoon spent watching my favorite television shows on On Demand or getting a full body massage at the spa. I could also decide to do some yoga to sweat out the toxins and burn away my stress or jump on the train and go visit a historic town and be a tourist for the day. Sitting at my favorite café with my delicious cup of coffee is also precious time spent for me; because it’s something I absolutely love doing. So the truth is, it could be anything at all – as long as it is something that will not make me think of the “I should have or could haves”.
During my ‘just for me’ moments, I tend to spend quite a bit of time soul-searching. I take a moment to look deep down inside to assess my strengths and talents and ask myself what more am I willing to give, with pleasure. I look at my interactions with others and now make my decisions on what “feels good” to me; not out of any sense of obligation or fear of the loss of anything. Once determined, I gently remove those people, obligations or energy vampires from my space. After reassessing the past couple of years of my life and where I placed my energy, I now truly understand the following…
- “Just for ME time” is the most important time you could ever schedule
- “Just for ME time” allows you the time to really connect with your truth
- “Just for ME time” if used for self-reflection, allows you to see where you are wasting energy on activities, people and obligations
- “Just for ME time” is a very healthy stress-reducer
When it’s time for my ‘just for ME” moments, I now see to it that I delegate tasks to others; those that I do not like to do as well as those that someone else can do for me. I am certain to decline invitations that would otherwise get in the way of my very important date with me. If you are not use to setting aside “just for ME” time, it would be a very healthy and simple habit to form and such a way to honor you.
Life is about finding out what brings you pleasure. Life is about loving what you do; not just doing what brings in the most money or has the best title. Life is a journey without a specific destination; it’s about enjoying the trip as well as the layovers. What has YOUR life been about? Running the rat-race doing things for others? Things that don’t feed your spirit? Things that ultimately drive you to bad health; migraines, digestive problems, ulcers, etc.? When do you think you will be ready to honor your spirit by setting aside your own “just for ME time?”
Go ahead, set a specific day and hour or two for weekly ‘just for me’ time. It will feed your body, your mind and your spirit immensely. You will love and honor yourself more when you do and the energy that you bring to all other interactions will increase as well. Raising my coffee cup to you in honor of your new “just for me time” practice…you so deserve it!